Aside from your baby being in intensive care, one of the things that makes NICU scary is all the beeping, bonging and other noises that resonate around the ward. Even worse is when you’re sitting with your baby, your nurse is on a break and something starts alarming. You immediately wonder what you’ve done, perhaps you knocked something? No, you can’t have. You were replying to one of a hundred messages sent from friends and family asking how your baby is and saying that everything will be fine. What then? What’s wrong? Where’s the nurse? Why can’t I see anyone? What can I do? Is this it?
I know it is hard to take a step back when you perceive something is wrong with your baby, but whilst a nurse may not be in your line of sight (don’t forget you’re focused on your baby) someone will always have an ear or eye on your baby and their condition and you have not been left on your own. Someone will be there as soon as they can even if it’s another baby’s nurse. Additionally, the nurses (who are amazing by the way – you’ll learn this for yourself, but I intend to write a little something about them too) know exactly what they’re doing and will have dealt with whatever it is innumerable times before. Just give them space to get to your baby and let them do what they do best.
My wife and I were shown around the NICU ward a few days before our daughters were born and we were even shown the 2 incubators that had been reserved for the girls as their arrival was imminent. The thing that struck us, above all else, was how many alarms and noises there were. Even the nurses noticed that we’d been take aback by the assault on our ears.
I’d like to say that our brief visit to the ward before the girls were born helped us to cope with the various alarms and sounds that we hear every time we visit. But I can’t, not really. It felt like we had been thrown in to the deep end and we struggled. My wife would dream of being in NICU, hearing the alarms and not being able to move. Not being able to help.
The array of alarms that surround you in NICU are overwhelming and emanate from so many different machines and pieces of equipment that I have found myself struggling to concentrate and becoming quite disorientated at times.
Below is a list of the items that can, and probably will, make some form of unnerving sound:
- Patient monitor
- Ventilator/CPAP machine
- Humidifier
- Incubator/cot
- IV pumps
To make things even more stressful, there isn’t just one alarm per item. No, that would be too easy. Instead each item will alarm for a number of reasons. For example the patient monitor can track your baby’s heart rate, respiratory rate, blood pressure, temperature and blood oxygen saturation level. The alarms for all of these sound exactly the same when they are triggered.
My wife and I spent the first week or two reacting to every beep and bong that escaped from the equipment monitoring our children. It felt as though we were constantly on egg shells waiting for that one alarm that meant it was all over. Every time an alarm went off we panicked, but the nurse would know exactly what to do, would never display even a smidgen of panic or uncertainty and would normally have everything under control in a couple of minutes. Yes, there have been a number of occasions where the nurse has had to call a doctor over to intervene. Everyone seems to talk in hushed voices, checking this and that and changing settings on the machines and, again, we fear the worst. But every time the alarms stop, the readings go back to what we’ve become used to and our little girl is settled again. Once our girl is settled, the doctor will come and speak to us to explain what happened, what they’ve done and what the plan to monitor or prevent the situation from occurring again is. We would then take a deep breath and go back to watching our girls sleep.
After those first few weeks and having been talked through what the various alarms mean by the nurses we are able to understand (for the most part) which alarms need to be worried about; which don’t need to be worried about; and which need to be monitored or compared against something else to determine if there is something wrong. We’ve even learnt that we are able to undertake some simple actions, such as comforting our girls with the comfort hold, to help settle them which can help to control their breathing and heart rate.
I don’t for a second imagine that you will ever find being in NICU “easy”. By its very definition it is going to be intense. However, I am hoping that by letting you know that we felt exactly the same way you do when it all began you can take some reassurance from me that it will get easier to be be in NICU and be with your baby.
The First 6 Weeks 